A Submissive Wife's Blog.

Love, Life, and Kinky Fuckery

Why I write.

I have seen a number of bloggers asking the question on Twitter “what do you want to see more of on my blog?” They ask their readership to guide them, and I assume this is because they seek to please their audience. My reply is always “write what you want to write about, people came to your blog to read what you have always written – so there is no need to change your content.” I believe this to be true. You, my wonderful reader, decided to follow my blog because of the promise of delicious kinky sex, and given the lack of kinky sex in the last few weeks you are probably extremely disappointed!

Why continue?

Well, because I love to write. I may not be any good at it, from a technical point of view, but I love to write. The schools I attended in my primary years, did not teach grammar. When people talk about pronouns, conjunctions and other such things, I have to google their meaning. I am not ashamed of this need, I don’t claim to be all knowing but I do my absolute best to improve, or at least understand.

It gives me something to do.

Yes, I know, I keep harping on about my current situation. That is because at the moment it is consuming my life! I spend all day in bed because this is the only place where I am not in so much pain I cry and feel sick. It is too as this position means I that the saddle anesthesia improves. As soon as I sit or stand it slowly returns. Let me give you an example, it is 14 steps from my bed to the toilet. In the time it takes me to take those steps, and sit on the loo for a wee, I can no-longer feel as I wipe myself. That is how long it takes for the disc to compress the spinal nerves. It takes about an hour for the feeling to return, after I get back into the reclined position. The longer I am sat or stood, the more chance that the nerves could be permanently damaged, and so I stay in this position, with only the online communities and my cats for company. S2 brings me drinks and food but as I have said before, he is not ‘a friend’ that I can chat to, he is my son.

Once a fortnight, I have a chat with my cleaners – yes I have cleaners – they are a wonderful couple who have helped with the housework for 4 years, so Mr H does not have to clean the house as well as look after me, and do all the cooking! The rest of the time I watch TV, knit, crochet, and work on here.


One of the TV programs that Mr H and I are binge watching is Criminal Minds, and they often have a quote at the beginning and or the end of the show. One of them really hit home with me and I wanted to share it with you.

Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self.

Cyril Connolly [The New Statesman, 25th February 1933]

Pretty deep eh? So that’s my nugget of wisdom for today. Write for yourself, be true to yourself, write about things that inspire you, write because you simply have to put the words on paper, and above all speak from your heart.Β  Everything else will work itself out in the end.Β Β 

Sweetgirl x

PS….. There will be more kinky fuckery on the blog soon, I promise πŸ™‚

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33 thoughts on “Why I write.”

      1. This is why I’m skipping more and more memes. I did ask twitter what they would like to see, because it never seems to match up with my stats, and I am trying to build up readership to potentially make my blog profitable. Most people come for the photos, which sort of bums me out. Second, it’s the fiction, but when I asked, they wanted more real life sex. All this means to me is that I’m already doing it right…a little of everything. And you are very right, we should always write for ourselves first. (I really love the new look of your blog. It is simple and pretty and easy to navigate.)
        Brigit Delaney recently posted…D/s as a Regular Show of FaithMy Profile

        1. Thank you 😊😊😊😊 it was a labour of love and I really didn’t know how it would work out but in the end I’ve got everything how I want it. I enjoyed making the animations and pop out side bars. I still do a little tweak when I see a problem, or when a reader tells me of one. Thankfully I think I now have all the posts showing on the page layout as some were coming up wrong.

          Your blog is lovely, and your content is perfect, it is sometimes frustrating when the images are the most popular things but for those of us who stick around we enjoy reading about you and your life – please don’t change 😊😊

  1. There was a reason that we wrote what we did when first firing up the empty blog that’s screaming ‘feed me’. It’s what came naturally in our desire (or need) to express a part of ourselves.

    Whilst there are reasons to change and expand what we write, I can only do so provided I keep authentic to myself. If I lose that, I’ve lost my ability to write.

    Keep on doing your thing, sweet. 🌹🌹

  2. I totally agree with you about wrintng to please yourself. I think Jane Austen said something similar. For some reason humour seems to creep into my writing and not too much of what you call kinky fuckery. But I have my moments! I did have English grammar lessons at school. Rather too many of them of them. I much preferred English Literature.

    1. Yes when I attended university I chose English Literature, but when it comes to writing I suspect grammar has more use lol.

      I believe what makes blogging so special is that it is personal writing, we can allow our personalities to filter into our writing in a way that might be frowned upon in literary circles 😊😊

  3. Catching up on your blog. Sorry I haven’t been around much. This might be a strange suggestion but have you considered an adult potty chair so that you don’t always have to make the trek to the bathroom?

    I suck at grammar and punctuation and often have to check my spelling. I use Microsoft word to proofread my posts. I probably still miss errors. I’ve never noticed any mistakes in your writing.
    s.e. recently posted…He went on a date?My Profile

    1. Hi, you don’t need to apologise! We all have lives πŸ™‚

      I am afraid I won’t have a commode, of all the things MrH has to do it would kill me to have him emptying a commode pan.

      I have, over the years become relatively proficient at managing my dyslexia, and in can spot mistakes in typed format that I could not see in handwritten text. MrH also tends to read my posts and tells me if he spots an error..

      I also have some fellow bloggers who message me if they spot a typo. It’s a wonderful community in that way.


  4. That is an excellent quote! I find myself questioning if I should keep writing, why I do so when I have almost entirely ceased with erotica and we don’t explore kink enough to keep people interested, and if I am writing for others or for myself. Some days it’s my only connection to the world beyond my microcosm, so in the end it doesn’t matter why I write.

    I enjoy reading about your life, even the non-kinky parts. I think part of that is because reading about the regular, every-day parts of your life makes you feel like actual people, whereas only reading about the kinky stuff creates a fictionalized version of the writer. If that makes any sense, lol. πŸ™‚

  5. I’ve enjoyed your blog whether kinky or not, like HH said- it is real.

    I’ve found myself struggling to write if I try to write for the audience. Some memes feed into a draft I’ve already started and those posts seem to feel more authentic.

    I lack some of the fundamentals when it comes to writing and it makes me feel inadequate at times. Especially trying to write for the marathon.
    Jae Lynn recently posted…LiFE- Keeping me in stitchesMy Profile

    1. Oh me too. I question every word. I found it easier to write coursework at university!

      Thank you Jae, your blog is one I also enjoy reading very much 😊😊

  6. That is a great quote sweet and I think you give some good advice here. I like reading about all the parts of your life so it’s not just the sexy stuff that pulls me in 😊
    missy recently posted…Intent and impactMy Profile

  7. That is a fabulous quote, Sweet, and one I will have to put somewhere on my screen, so I don’t forget it. I need to get back to writing for myself, and not writing things because I want to support memes. I have lost some of myself in the process, and I am not prepared to do that anymore. Thank you for reminding me why I started my blog.

    Rebel xox

    1. Well you’re very welcome 😊😊😊

      I know I struggle to write for the sake of it, and sometimes that it how it feels when I try to take part in all the memes… my situation has meant I have had to rethink how much I try to do. If I am not inspired by the subject matter I will not force myself to take part.


  8. dear Sweety, i highly appreciate your originality and that you ARE honest and open person. Those, who are asking their followers about what to write, they are just doing their business. But you are living your life. Sincerely, Lisa

    1. Thank you x I think some are trying to grow their blogs and it can be very tempting to try and please the masses to do so, to do some market research as it where…

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