I could really do with a rousing motivational speech. The consultant doesn’t want me to take the strong opioids, without the strong opioids my pain is at level 8. To remind you what that means, I have put the pain scale below. I am trying to stay positive but when all you can think about is how much you hurt, it becomes difficult. Extremely difficult.
For years I have equated my pain to a 7 without pain medication. The medication has always reduced it to a 4 or 5. At the moment I am at a 9 the morphine drops me to an 8 and the caudal epidural I was supposed to have on Saturday has been cancelled because of my new symptoms.
Quite frankly I don’t know how much longer I can stand this pain. Like I said, I really need a motivational speech right now, or someone to take this pain away!
I have so much I want to do. I want to write for Food 4 Thought, especially as it is my suggestion but I can’t concentrate. This post has taken me 3 hours so far. 183 words in 3 hours, and I have taken diazepam. Without it I would still be curled up in a ball.
Well, I just don’t have one in me.
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