Curiosity killed the cat they say, but a healthy dose of it can do wonders for your sex life.
It would be safe to say that my curiosity about kink eventually allowed me to overcome my embarrassment and express this to MrH, even if this was somewhat clumsy (another C word) in both the way I tried to express myself and in the timing of the conversation (see Asking the question- part 2 for more details on that!).
I wanted to know what it would feel like to be dominated, to be controlled and what I got was much more than I could have imagined.
In this new dynamic I am calmer. My mind is mostly quietened and I am content. I have talked about this in more detail in my post Serenity in Submission and
My confidence has increased too. So really there are lots of C words I can relate to my submissive self and life.