Triggers is a term that comes up frequently. “What triggers your sub space?” “What triggers your submissive mental space?” What triggers your dominance?” But triggers in this context can be hard to identify, but for me I define it as “a single or series of events that lead to an altered state of mental awareness.”
What sends me deep into sub-space one week might not another and of course MrH is trying to work out what these triggers are so he can use them.
I think I have very few single triggers, however, if my mindset is already turned to deeply submissive, and MrH gives orders (suck Sirs Cock, pull your pants down and bend over, lie on the bed etc) then my body will respond and get wet, my submissive state deepens and I’m only focused on him. I need that focus, that connection, his commanding authority to make me let go of the outside world.
If it’s been a few days since I have been used. If there’s been no extra dominance from MrH, then I find that our routine things no longer serve to “keep” my mind actively submissive. During the moment, for example while my collar is changed, a calm settles over me. I’m responsive and focused only on him. By the time I leave the room in a morning, that calm has lifted and my mind is racing on with that days planned events. I go to work and come home. We cuddle and I can sometimes return to the right mind set. But…. When this continues for a few days, my mental focus lifts. When this happens I have realised I need a series of things to happen to ensure that my mind is switched to on and my body is ready to respond to Him.
I need him to pull me back with his voice.
I need him to make me his.
I need him to strip me of the distractions of the week. Peel them away, remind me I am his and I don’t belong to work.
Unfortunately, at this moment in time, I do not know how MrH would do this. It’s something I’ve only recently realised, and so it will take some trial and probable error to work out the most effective triggers. I am also highly aware that this post is all about what I’m feeling and need – I am confident that if MrH needs anything from me he will let me know, and equally if he feels or thinks I am being selfish or demanding he will definitely let me know!!!
Still next Friday is my Birthday and we are away overnight…. we are off work all day… and will have plenty of time to play. I know MrH will make the most of it. I have a surprise present that he has purchased with the assistance of the knickerfairy on Twitter, and I am looking forward to seeing what he bought.
It’s been quite some time since we had play that sent me deep into subspace. I’ve hovered around the edge, relaxed and delicious, sleepy and calm, but the high, floating away feeling has been elusive. In part I think because of distractions or issues.
In the meantime MrH will continue to evaluate and discuss how to best identify and utilise triggers.