I am experiencing sub-drop.
MrH is taking good care of me. He is always my protector, looking out for me.
I’ve put a link below to one of my favourite articles on sub-drop by Jenifer Bene, for anyone who reads this who has never experienced it I urge you to read this regardless of if you are a Dom(me) or sub… Each person needs to know about it and how to deal with it.
On a side note, she also has a great post on sub-space in her ‘Ask Me Anything (AMA)’ page which again I recommend both D and s alike read as once a sub gets deep into sub space they are no longer able to tell you they are hurt/have had enough- the D must be able to recognise is and respond accordingly.
Back to my point..
I’m lucky that I am married to my Dom, he can see I am not myself and is able to respond accordingly.
It was an inevitable thing I think – this drop. We had never had such a long and intense play session.
So he’s being solicitous and caring. He’s reassuring me and he’s asking me to complete little submissive tasks (getting him drinks), to help me maintain my head space, and I’m so grateful.
I decided to write an entry in my sub diary last night reflecting on the last 6 months.. how I’ve changed, how my hard limits have changed, and in such a short space of time.
I’ve come to realise that MrH is definitely enjoying being a Dom. And he knows me better than I thought possible.
I’ll give you an example. A few months ago there was a post on Fetlife asking for models to help a lady make some corsets for an exhibition. MrH told me about it. And I contacted the lady. A few weeks later I met her, she’s a Domme who is married to a lovely gentleman who enjoys being flogged but is not her sub or slave… This Domme has a slave. I got on really well with this Domme and she encouraged me to consider going to a local club called The Townhouse. She told me about the munch there, and the beginners nights. Encouraged me to reach out to the club owner if I had any concerns. I was also privileged to be shown her play room. When I got home I told all this to MrH. And he said maybe we would go in the new year.
What I didn’t realise/think about until a few days ago is how much pre-planning MrH does. I asked if we would be going to the munch in January. He responded that he hadn’t specified January just the New Year. He went on to say that he was waiting for me to be ready.
I had thought that this was the other way round… MrH doesn’t like social events so I assumed he was reluctant to go. Then I’ve re-evaluated and I’ve come to the following conclusions:
- He saw the post on a page for a BDSM club. So he had already looked into it.
- If he didn’t want to go he wouldn’t have suggested it.
- He knew I had concerns about protocols/expectations in a social setting.
- He allowed me time to work through them and for my natural curiosity to outweigh my anxiety.
- He’s a very very smart and considerate man (which I did know just perhaps didn’t fully appreciate)
So now I’m hoping we are going to the munch on the second Tuesday of January…. Who’d have thought it?!
Right – I’m going back to my snuggles and my hot drink. I have some happy chemicals to replenish 😁